When Love Strays

beppo 088

It’s 3:00 in the morning, and there’s something I haven’t told you. Beppo, our best beloved kitty, disappeared a week ago. After dinner he went out, and he never came back. This, a cat who never missed a meal. This, a cat who slept between our two pillows many nights. This, a cat who captured our heart to the extent that we brought him to France with us, and back again. This, a cat whom we loved to distraction. This, a cat who never came home.

Zazou is frantic, in her own way. She’s never known a life without Beppo, since we adopted her in France and brought her home to be Beppo’s friend.


I’m frantic, in my way. Beppo has always slept with me, comforted me, been the hit of every party I’ve given, followed me everywhere, loved me unconditionally, seen me through it all.

Sitting outside, drinking Spanish brandy, on a night still warm and filled with stars, Beppo is not in my lap. Beppo was almost never not in my lap.


The channel marker blinks on and off, on and off, saying here I am, here I am. Beppo does not tell us where he is, why he can’t come home.


Danger is everywhere in  our world, but for seven years Beppo faced it all with a beautiful calm.


Eagles, racoons, coyotes, cars, even cougar prints in the sand, according to a neighbor. He could be shut in somewhere. He could have been catnapped by someone who admired his sleek silkiness and affection for everyone he met. The world seems to have swallowed him up, leaving us no clues.

Shel and I try not to cry, too much. Every time we walk through the gate, Beppo is not waiting for us, gracing the garden with his stripes and spots. When we eat, Beppo is not sitting in a chair next to us, not under the napkin on my lap. Worst of all, when I can’t sleep, like tonight, he’s not there, making sure I’m alright.

Saint Antonin 520

Explore posts in the same categories: French Letters Visits America


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23 Comments on “When Love Strays”

  1. melinda Says:

    sorry for your lost cat…..awful not to know….i can certainly identify….have 3 kitties & there is always one who is my special beau…..fingers crossed Beppo will re-appear

  2. Char Says:

    Abra and Shel, I have experienced what you’re going through and know the pain. I am so sorry this has happened.

  3. barrytwyman Says:

    Having shared Beppo in France and The U.S.A, I feel for you Both . He has gone walkabouts before….he may be home before you leave….I really hope so xx

  4. So sorry. Hoping for a safe return soon.

  5. steveroth Says:

    So sorry. Such a good soul. Hoping a hardy one as well. Best….

  6. Lucy Says:

    Hoping he comes back.

  7. Michelle Says:

    Oh Abra! I am so sorry. I really hope he finds his way back to the home and people he loves.

  8. Sue Geisler Says:

    nothibg we-all can say can ease the agony. It’s just hell not to know! An end is one thing, but this is not fine. I hope it ends better than you fear.
    I am sorry!


  9. Erin Says:

    Oh Abra: I’m so sorry to read this about Beppo. My beloved orange tabby, Cheddy, disappeared about a year and a half ago and I still miss him terribly. My fingers are crossed that sweet Beppo is shut in some where and will find his way out and back to you. I’ve heard amazing tales of cat/owner reunions after several weeks and months have passed, I hope this happens to you!

  10. Annie Welch Says:

    Oh Abra!! Not sweet Beppo! (Hugs) There’s hope! My cat Spike was locked in our neighbor’s crawlspace for 12 days a few years ago, and he disappeared for a week one time too. Both times we thought he was gone forever. I hope you put up some flyers around the neighborhood. My neighbors wouldn’t have known it was our cat in their basement if they hadn’t seen the notices. I hope he comes back!!! Don’t give up hope yet!

  11. thebrookcook Says:

    I am heartbroken for you- he looks so sweet and beautiful in your photographs. I wish him a safe return. ❤

  12. Smithy Says:

    I can’t tell you how sorry I am, because it wouldn’t mean much anyway, but I can tell you that I grieve with you, deeply, from deep and hard experience. I hope Beppo turns up, against all fears, alive and more or less well. Stranger things have happened than to have a beloved cat re-appear out of nowhere, and I hope it happens for you and yours.

  13. Catanea Says:

    Yes! Do put up flyers with photos EVERYWHERE and look EVERYWHERE TWICE.
    Three separate friends have told me “cat shut in somebody else’s garage” stories in which the garage HAD BEEN LOOKED IN but THAT’S where the cat was. In two of these stories, the cat IS found alive, but sadly doesn’t long survive the ordeal. In the other it was too late.
    Put flyers in local mailboxes.
    I hope he is found!

  14. purrs for strength and comfort

  15. THIS HAPPENED TO ME WITH MY “Romeo” . What a terrible feeling. But, don’t give up… Romeo finally came home. I think he had gotten shut up some where. I pray your Beppo finds his way home!

  16. jeanne Says:

    Praying fervently with everyone else that Beppo finds his way home soon, just like Zazou did a while back.

  17. Smithy Says:

    I think one of the worst things is not knowing. On the one hand, as long as you don’t know otherwise you can keep hoping that Beppo is well and not far away, and will be able to come home. On the other hand, every day you don’t know, don’t get a sign, don’t have a clue is another day of pain and unwelcome mystery. We lost our beloved Morgan le Fay to the desert last spring; the little sorceress stayed out one evening and never came home. We scoured the place. No hair, no trace, no clues. It should have been safer for her there than here in our home woods, but it wasn’t safe enough. I still miss her terribly and wonder what happened. I hope Beppo comes home, that you don’t have to keep adjusting to life without him.

  18. jeanne Says:

    I keep coming back to check and see if there’s any news. I share your pain ….

  19. Abra Bennett Says:

    I am so sorry to say that there’s no news. We’ve given up hope.

  20. Smithy Says:

    I grieve with you, and for you.

  21. emily Says:

    I’m so sorry. I’ve enjoyed reading about your kitties so much over the past few years.

  22. Don’t give up. You never know what is around the corner.

  23. Carolyn Says:

    So sorry that I didn’t see this, as we were away. My friend’s kitty disappeared for almost 6 months, and then suddenly reappeared. She really wanted to be able to ask where he had been, and what adventure he had been on. But she was just thankful that he was back in their lives. I hope the same for you and Shel.

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